Lila Payne

Melbourne's most scrumptious companion

Lila Payne is Melbourne's most luscious companion. Luxe alabaster skin, plump gorgeous lips and curves to make a formula one driver weep, Lila + you = dream come true.

Uh Oh

If you're seeing this page its because you've made an enquiry, but have either ignored basic enquiry instructions, been rude, forgotten your manners, or something else which makes it necessary to remind you of how to make contact in a productive, polite and efficient way.

Try the following:

  • Read any and all texts you have previously been sent, if any, and follow the instructions you've already been given. This might include providing me with more information, or reading my website pages. You can't go wrong.
     
  • Read my profile or ad, and follow the information I have helpfully provided to assist you in making an enquiry.
     
  • If you've enquired via email or contact form because you can't enquire by text, then you should include your phone number in your email, and also tell me that you can't enquire via text for whatever reason. Even if you can't receive or send texts for some reason, you should still include your phone number, for security purposes. I won't text or call you on the number if that is what you need. 
     
  • Use your manners. Please, thank you, and other appropriate etiquette will get you a very long way.
     
  • Introduce yourself. Give me at least your first name so I know who I'm talking to. You can make one up if you feel you need to.
     
  • Don't ask questions that are easily answered by reading my website, ads, profiles, or text messages I have already sent you. All I will do is send you back there anyway.
    •  E.g. - "you avail?" - check my availability calendar (for tour dates), and my booking process, it will tell you right away if I'm available. I'm very very rarely available for last minute bookings, but sometimes you'll get lucky. 
    • "what are your services" (They're on my websites)
    • "what are your rates" - Hint : they're on my ads/profles, and my website. 
       
  • Don't ask me for selfies, photos, pics or whatever. There are literally hundreds on my websites, and on my Twitter accounts and my Instagram. 

A note on enquiring 'after hours'

As you should be aware, my personal assistant Alex handles all my enquiries. She might or might not reply to you if you text outside business hours (9-5), but she definitely won't reply if you text at 2am. Or 3.29am. Or whatever other ungodly time you think is appropriate. 

Like you, escorts (and their assistants) need sleep. We are not vampires, or possums or some other kind of nocturnal creature, and we don't sit around hoping for a 'you avail?' text at 3 in the morning. 

I am available for bookings between 10am and 11pm most days, but you should be using your common sense to book in advance, and for the love all that is holy, don't text after 9pm, unless its in reply to a text which has just been sent to you and requires a reply. 

 

If you'd like an example of a perfect enquiry text, see below.

 

Be like Geoff.

Lila Payne escort enquiry Good example

For bonus points, you can include where you saw my ad/profile (e.g. Crockor.com.au, as well as what specific package (Mistress, Temptress, Seductress) you are interested in.

 

Don't be like this asshole.

Lila Payne escort enquiry - bad example

SWA 8898XE